It’s true what they say: niche businesses are a real gamble. I took a business course after I left school, and a few of us gravitated together. We were informally called the Risky bunch by the tutor, since all our assignments were based on what we hoped to start when we finished. We promised to support each other through thick and thin that we’d help each other out, spread the word, all that…even for Billy, who wanted to start a wombat grooming salon. None of us thought it was a good idea, but he seemed to think that since he’d be the only one, he’d get ALL the business.
Not that my idea was inherently superior. I had this idea about people who did beauty diplomas and makeup courses, something big. Basically, it’d be like a callout services for people in need of makeup. It’s a tough gig to succeed in, makeup. Lots of people vying for jobs, a bit like…well, every industry ever. But here, I wanted to recruit some of the best of the best into a business that would send makeup artists out to all parts of Melbourne, perhaps with stations out even further. Suddenly found out that your in-laws are coming for a visit, spent all your time tidying the house and you look like a mess? We can be there in 20 minutes, guaranteed. Just pick up the phone, dial that number, tell us exactly what you need and one of our makeup agents will be right there. In the comfort of your own home, we’ll do whatever we can with the time you have, for a very reasonable rate! Repeat customers have the option of membership and discounted prices, and I intended there to be plenty of members. There would be standards after all.
Need some quick beauty pep-ups for a last minute night out? Or perhaps you just want to look fabulous, right now, no reason required. No problem! All our operatives are certified with a diploma of specialist makeup from a Melbourne university. We deal with all requests, big, small, weird and wonderful!
Or we would, if the business ever got off the ground. Any day now, I say. People aren’t going to suddenly stop being interested in being beautiful!
-Allan
There’s so much to love about a good old conference that I find myself confused about people’s reluctance to attend. In case you’re reading this and thinking to yourself “what on earth is he talking about?” let me spell it out for you.
I knew making it as a dancer would be hard. I wasn’t prepared for something like
Do you know what would be even more difficult than getting a fancy car on stage??
I’m a very level person, I think. Only a few things actually make me angry, chief among them when a film that I was really looking forward to doesn’t even come close to living up to its potential. Like in
Alright so I’m not going to count my chickens before they hatch but I think it’s safe to say I’ve landed a good gig. No no no, good is too bland an adjective. Excellent. This is probably my dream job and when you’re straight out of uni, landing a thing like this is the best you can hope for. Hell, it’s the best anyone can hope for. And, bizarrely, it feels like they really want me. Not like I’m one of thousands (which I definitely am) but like I’m special. Valued. They’re making a hell of an effort to meet me halfway, to throw in a couple of perks. At the moment, the major point under contention is whether I should have a
Seriously, I don’t know why people even bother dreaming, because the real life is a harsh place and there’s no real way to achieve them.
espise children. To think I ever was one sends a cold shiver up my spine and creates wayward twitch in the corner of my mouth, creasing the lines of my face in recognisable distaste. I find most everything about children displeasing. From the harsh sounds that explode out of their mouths to the grubby marks they leave on the surface of all they touch, they are a stain on the face of the earth. However, if they must be a necessarily stain, at least they are a temporary one. They are the embodiment of a phase that’s physical traits last at most fifteen years (while the psychological traits may last a lifetime).
so sick of being on the stands. I’ve spent practically my whole life here, sitting in the freezing cold, rugged up in layer upon layer and a warm parka to boot. Folding my sister’s parkas over me as a kind of makeshift blanket because, even with all these layers, it’s still cold enough to make me nose turn red. Thank goodness the staff here are nice. At least they treat me as a person, not a pack mule.
Often I wonder how people manage to get through each day in their lives without the help of medication. It seems like most people have no idea of common sense and logic. My seventeen year old daughter for example is a prime example of this phenomenon. The husband and I took the kids away for a nice family vacation together, but being at a difficult age, my daughter thought it would be boring and insisted on staying at home. She put forward a strong case for not coming along to the family holiday by saying she had far too much homework to do for her